


Once Bitten, Not Shy

by BadBlond099



Series: OTP Shameless Smutfics [4]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Constantine (Comic), Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Consent is Sexy, Everything between the main three mentioned is consensual, M/M, Multi, Non-Consensual Bondage, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rape/Non-con Elements, Shameless Smut, Threesome - M/M/M, Vampire Bites, Vampire Turning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:15:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22566907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BadBlond099/pseuds/BadBlond099
Summary: John dropped his hand on Dick’s head and let his fingers tangle into his dark locks. “This is not how I thought this was gonna go, lads. I don’t even know your proper names.”“Dick,” Jason whispered.“Yeah, I know what he’s—”“His name…It’s Dick.”John smiled as Jason pressed his nose under John’s jawline and bit into him again. “Cute. Dick…Dick and Jay-Jay. Fuck me, I’m gonna have fun with Dick an’ Jay.”
Relationships: Dick Grayson/Jason Todd, Dick Grayson/Jason Todd/John Constantine
Series: OTP Shameless Smutfics [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1583449
Comments: 11
Kudos: 111





	Once Bitten, Not Shy

**Author's Note:**

> Hurray for Dick and Jay!
> 
> Seriously digging my own grave with my writing. But I can keep having fun with these little one-shots!
> 
> NGL, this one's pret-ty damned shameless. >///<'
> 
> It's based off the Grayson Annual where Dick's identity had been discovered by various people. Among those people was John Constantine, who regaled us with a tale of bondage and blood sucking that made me blush a little. Of course it ended abruptly with Dick being a smooth-talking badass, but the mind reels...well they led to this.
> 
> Anywho, hope it's enjoyable! I apologize now for my attempts at writing John's accent. I am NOT British and NOT a pro at the whole cockney thing...
> 
> OH! And the Gag Reel returns again! Little longer scenarios this time, but just for fun and to mock the holes in my own writing!

“Nunjas are not a thing,” Jason said, taking a picture of the desecrated church Dick had gone out of his way to drag them out to. “Nuns are about as far from ninjas as things get.”

Dick peered through his binoculars, trying to see if there were any signs of life. “I’m telling you, they were dressed in all black, their faces covered, and they were trained in the art of assassination. Plus they had that nun hat thingy!”

“And the League of Assassins dresses basically the same way, but they’re not ninjas either.” Jason leaned against a nearby tree, tapping his arm as he waited for Dick to find whatever was supposedly stealing virgins from the little town where they’d chosen to vacation together.

“Maybe they ARE ninjas! You don’t know their life!”

“Okay. I DO know what it’s like in Nanda Parbat and I know what it’s like to be a member of the League of Assassins, so that’s a stupid argument on your part. Also, ninjas are Japanese, so your whole argument is moot.”

“Killjoy.”

“Whatever. The place is empty. It’s just town-lore. Let’s get back to the hostel. I didn’t come out here to play detective with you. I still can’t believe you packed your suit.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t pack yours. You look like a wannabe ninja turtle,” Dick teased, noting the red bandage Jason had tied around his head with slits in it for his eyes. “And it probably says something that I’m turned on by a ninja turt—Oh! Something moved!”

“Something moved in the abandoned church in the middle of the night. Congrats! Your eyes are good enough to spot…”

“…rats? I’m pretty sure that’s too big to be a rat, Jay…Jay?” He looked over his shoulder to find some freaky looking women holding Jason’s limp body. “Whoa. What's happening here?”

“Two delicious morsels have landed in my lap, and that’s an opportunity I will not let go to waste.”

There was a sharp pain in Dick’s neck before his vision whited out.

*****

“I’m going to…kill you…freaky fucks…”

If someone had asked Dick just a couple of days ago whether or not he believed in vampires, he would have laughed at them. He’d have told them that there was no reason to fear blood-sucking weirdos with a garlic allergy. It was a simpler time and Dick was a simpler man.

Now, it was hard not to think about how expertly they’d tied him up—like a pig for the barbeque, he was useless. His wrists had been connected to his ankles, keeping both his arms and legs uncomfortably pulled back behind him. The way the ropes weaved around his abdomen, his pectorals, his neck…every time he even shifted just to reposition, it felt like the ropes tightened.

“Jay,” he rasped out as the rope around his neck pressed painfully against his Adam’s apple. “Jay!”

Jason thrashed, rattling the chains that had him cuffed to the far wall.

Dick could do nothing but watch before when the she-monsters had forced Jason to drink from a goblet. That had been nearly an hour ago, by his guess. Since then the girls had taken to stroking Dick’s exposed flesh, tickling him as they forced him to watch Jason’s slow transformation. Those normally brilliant blue eyes—broken up by the flecks of green he’d gained upon emerging from the Lazarus Pit with renewed life—were now scarlet red and focused hungrily on Dick.

“Such vigor! Truly, I chose well.” The man in charge—the ‘elder vampire’ as Dick had taken to knowing him—sat next to Dick’s head and moved him so that he was resting in his lap, alarmingly close to the guy's undead manhood (were vampires undead? Did immortality work that way? He wasn’t sure. Whatever the situation, though, he did NOT love the position he was stuck in, and bile rose in his throat as the ancient relic of a man raked spindly fingers through his hair). Jason snarled and strained so hard against the chains that Dick could have sworn he saw the anchor points crack. “The both of you appear to be simply divine meals to be had and—” he let his fingers glide down along Dick’s cheek, "—enjoyed…but it would be a shame not to keep at least one of you as a consolation prize. One fewer entrée to consume, but one fantastic meal to be savored.”

Dick struggled in spite of himself and moaned as the ropes dug into his pectoral muscles from the strain. “W-won’t…won’t let you touch him,” he growled out.

“Oh, don’t worry. We have certain ways to ensure that he never feels anything but pleasure for as long as I allow him to live,” the elder vampire promised. “Just like my precious daughter wives.”

The women slinked over to Jason as Dick was forced to watch. They slid their hands over him in spite of his violent protests. “Kill you…kill you,” he continued to mutter as his body betrayed him under their touch. “Dick…Ah…”

“Don’t…please…” Dick watched fearfully as Jason was brought to climax at their touch. He slumped forward, his arms pulled back at a painful angle as he stopped struggling. “Jay…”

“It’s almost time. Daughter wives, if you please.”

The girls each kissed Jason once before returning to the pillar where Dick was being kept. They moved slowly, carefully lifting him from their master’s lap. They shared his weight among themselves and began tracing their fingers along major arteries, intimately picking out their preferred spots. Finally, they sank their pointed teeth into him.

“Ah!”

Dick didn’t like shots. He didn’t like needles. He knew it was cliché and given the fact that most of the medical treatment he’d received over the years was from Alfred and involved various injections to help boost his immunity to all sorts of things, he really shouldn't be one to complain. And yet, like a child, he would hold his breath every single time and count the seconds until it was over.

To his surprise, this didn’t feel like another shot. This felt…intoxicating. It was like getting drunk faster than he could even consume alcohol. Every breath he took left him vulnerable to more sensations. The girls sucked on the wounds they’d created, drawing the life out of him, and all he could think was how much he hoped they enjoyed it. He longed bring them as much pleasure as they were giving him. He wanted to be good for them. The desire overwhelmed anything else. He was pure putty in their hands.

“That’s it, my girls. Not a word of protest left in him now. Save some for your new brother. The transformation won’t be complete until he’s drunk his first human dry.” The elder vampire looked back at Jason, who remained motionless, leaning away from the chains keeping him to the wall. “The smell must be intoxicating, my pet,” he taunted. “It’s not difficult to recognize that you care about him. Rest assured, you will provide him with the ultimate pleasure before he passes from this world.”

Jason didn’t even blink.

“Now now, my child. No need to sulk. Once you’ve fully turned, you’ll know nothing but pleasure. I’ll see to it that your every thirst is slaked. You’ll never want for anything again. You’ll never know pain. You’ll never know sadness. You’ll be far too consumed by the heat of passion for such unnecessary things.”

“…”

The elder vampire leaned closer to Jason. “What was that, love?”

“I’ll…kill…you…”

The old man chuckled. “Such fire. Definitely chose right.” He returned to the others and waved his hands. The girls scattered, and he caught Dick’s limp form in his arms. “You’re going to make such a wonderful offering. But it would be a shame not to taste you myself.” He touched the pulse point just under Dick’s jawline and smiled. He glanced over at Jason, who was now glaring at him with renewed fire in his eyes. “That’s my boy.”

Dick’s mouth fell agape as the elder vampire sank his teeth into his neck. His pupils were blown as they fell on Jason, unseeing as more pleasure was forced upon him. He was lightheaded. Tired. Hot. No…cold?

The elder vampire pulled away from his neck and whispered, “Girls, it’s time. Bring your new brother to me.”

Just then, the magical barrier keeping them enclosed and separate from the world shattered and a man in a long tan trench coat fell onto the scene.

“Bloody fuckin’ hell, didn’t think that’d work!” The man held up a relic and chanted an ancient incantation that made the girls hiss as their skin sizzled. “You think you’re havin’ fun with these lads? Well, you’re gonna love me.”

“You dare to intrude upon this sacred ritual?”

“Damn right I do!” Another incantation and a burning hellhound was unleashed in the chamber. It barely had to touch the vampires for them to burst into flames. In no time at all, it was just the man, Dick, and Jason, alone in a weird chamber. “Not a moment too soon, I s’pose.” The hellhound dispersed in a puff of smoke and John took out a pocket knife, cutting the ropes keeping Dick bound. “Yer gonna be alright now, mate. We oughtta get you to the hospital and get some o’ what you lost put back in.”

“Jay…Jay…”

“Not quite. The name’s John, hot-stuff. John Constantine.”

“No…Please…help him…”

John looked over his shoulder at the boy still in mid transformation, glaring daggers into his back. “Ah. I take it the two of you are close then?”

He cut the ropes a bit more, giving Dick freer range of motion before heading towards Jason. “You must be Jay-Jay.”

Jason strained against the chains again and this time the anchor points gave out, he stumbled onto his hands and knees in a daze.

“Easy there, big boy. Looks like they were try’nna change you. That makes things a bit dodgy. Lemme guess. You must be parched.” He started tracing runes on his left forearm, muttering an incantation as he worked. Jason watched hungrily, waiting for the go ahead like a trained animal. “I’ll give it to you, you make one helluva patient beastie. Most in your situation would’ve already drank me and your pretty little friend dry.”

“I…know you…”

John scoffed. “Not usually a good thing when I’m recognized. Tell me, how have I made your acquaintance?”

“You’re with the League.”

That made John raise an eyebrow. “You a hero or sumn?”

Jason nodded towards Dick. “He is. Not me.”

“Well, that’s delightfully cryptic.” John finished the runes and cracked his neck. “Alright then. Drink up beas—”

Jason was on John in the blink of an eye, holding him intimately and forcing his head to crane back, exposing his neck.

“Whoa whoa! Look, I’ve altered my juices so that you’ll be sucking in a lil’ sumn sumn what’ll undo the transformation, but let’s not forget I’m still human, mate. Do me a favor and show a lil’ restrai—yiii!”

Jason sank his teeth into John, drinking him recklessly.

John’s arms fell limp at his sides as Jason continued to take all that he had to offer. He stopped abruptly to lick at the bloody wound and nuzzle against John's neck. “Mm sorry.”

“Bloody hell. You…you were already producing venom,” John muttered, his eyes swimming sleepily through the venom induced haze.

“Vampires produce…venom?” Jason muttered.

Not a second later, Dick’s hand landed on Jason’s leg. He’d crawled over to them, still flush from heat and yet pale from blood loss. He pulled himself over and pressed his cheek to Jason’s thigh, inhaling deeply.

Jason’s face turned fiery red and he moved his cheek so that it scraped along the stubble on John’s chin.

“Yeah. ‘Case you haven’t guessed, Vampire venom is something of an aphro—DITE, MARY MAGDALENE, SWEET LILITH!” John pressed a hand against Dick’s head as the lust-intoxicated man fumbled with the belt keeping his slacks up. “Jay-Jay, your man is doin’ some things I don’t think you’ll appreciate him doin’ later!”

Jason inhaled deeply just by John’s ear before lowering himself to Dick’s level and gently coaxing him away from John’s pants in order to steal a kiss.

“Fuckin’ vampire nonsense causing problems and—whoa whoa whoa! Stop that!” John slapped Jason on the nose like he was disciplining a dog, getting him to release his hold on Dick’s bottom lip where he’d bitten through. “He’s too drained, mate! And his blood’s just going to restart your transformation! If you’re thirsty, you drink—fuck!” Jason bit down on John’s wrist, right over the runes, and began drinking him again. "Give a man some warning!"

The more that was taken from John, the less he felt the strength to fight them off. Dick resumed seeking something to settle his oral fixation, getting John’s pants down so that he could fish in his boxers for what he wanted.

“Boys, boys, boys…you don’t want this,” John said in a shaky voice while Jason began working his trench coat off his shoulders. “I want this. I want you to work me over. I want the two very…very pretty boys to show me a good time. But that’s the venom talking. That’s the…that’s the…” Dick began kissing the tip of John’s member, suckling at it like Jason would at any wound his newly-pointed teeth created. The heat of the situation, the feeling of two grown men stroking, sucking, and loving on him…John was losing his perspective fast.

Then he felt Jason’s hard manhood pressed against him and he moaned as Dick let John's own erection slide deep into his mouth.

“Oh fuck. This is happening, isn’t it?”

Jason dragged his tongue up John’s arm, over his dress shirt, along his neck, and up to the crook behind his ear. “It’s okay, John,” Jason said with a breathy chuckle. “Let’s just…enjoy this…”

It was like he’d said the magic words. John became a malleable mass of willingness in his arms. Dick let John’s cock pop out of his mouth and reached out, stroking Jason’s back to full attention. “We’re okay with this. God, John, we want this.”

John dropped his hand on Dick’s head and let his fingers tangle into his dark locks. “This is not how I thought this was gonna go, lads. I don’t even know your proper names.”

“Dick,” Jason whispered.

“Yeah, I know what he’s—”

“His name…It’s Dick.”

John smiled as Jason pressed his nose under his jawline and bit into him again. “Cute. Dick…Dick and Jay-Jay. Fuck me, I’m gonna have fun with Dick an’ Jay.”

Dick sat up, trying to get to their level and, like a magnet, Jason was drawn to Dick’s neck. John managed to put his hand around Dick’s neck in time to intercept Jason’s bite with a soft hiss. “Now, now, Jay-Jay. You got your cocktail right here. I can take that hunger of yours. Your boy can’t.”

Jason sucked and kissed at John’s hand alternatingly before growling, “That’s quite the offer. Think you can stay true to it?” He began working at the buttons on John’s shirt, plucking it open one at a time before sliding the red tie off of his neck. John leaned into the boys’ touches, desperate to show them the same passionate affection that they were showing him. Every kiss felt like fire. Every bite just as intoxicating as it was painful. Every touch…

After Jason tried to bite Dick again, John pushed Dick down and he rolled onto his back, smiling and laughing like he was high as a kite. His knees fell to either side and he began palming himself for John and Jason to see.

“This is bad for my heart,” John muttered.

Jason scoffed and turned John so that his front was pressed against John’s back and he was facing Dick’s sprawled out form. Jason ran a hand up from John’s hip to just under his arm. “Are you used to men, John?”

John shuddered. “It’s…been a bit.”

In response, Jason slipped a single finger inside of John, making him suck in a breath of air.

“It’s okay. Do me a favor?”

John’s whole body felt like it was pulled taut. Like he was on fire and in danger of being burned alive. “Anything…anything!”

Jason rested his chin over John’s shoulder and whispered, “Do as I do.”

It was like a hypnotic command. John traced his left hand down along Dick’s abdomen, pulling a moan from him, before taking the index finger of his right hand. Jason pulled his finger out to circle John’s rim a few times. John shuddered and did the same to Dick, swirling his finger around the rim of muscle between his cheeks.

When Jason breached, John breached.

When Jason pressed, John pressed.

Jason coaxed moans from John and had Dick stretched out on the stone floor, reacting just as happily to John’s every touch.

“He’s ready,” Jason whispered.

“He’s…wait…what?”

Jason pressed a second finger into John and started pushed both fingers in as deep as they could go. John closed his eyes and arched his back, unable to think past the intrusions. “Show him some love too,” Jason whispered before sinking his teeth into the muscle of John’s shoulder. “It’s okay. He can take it.”

Maybe Dick could, but John felt too full. He couldn’t imagine more than just fingers inside of him. This was a bad idea this was—

“Aaaaugh!”

Then Jason pressed on one, very specific spot. Both fingers digging into a bundle of nerves in John that threw gasoline on the flames. He shuddered as he mimicked the motion, feeling for the same bundle of nerves in Dick until he drew out the same sort of reaction. Dick mewled, positively over-stimulated. Only then did Jason begin scissoring his fingers, occasionally probing at John’s prostate to keep him suppliant and open. John did his best to keep up the same treatment for Dick, but he was melting. He couldn’t take much more. Or was it that he wanted more? When this was all over, he was going to have to find better methods to deal with vampiric transformations. Or maybe he’d just retire and become a hermit somewhere. Somewhere he’d never see another man, woman, or demon ever again.

Jason took his fingers and his fangs out at the same time, eliciting a soft gasp from John, who pulled his fingers out of Dick just a little too quickly to be comfortable. Jason pressed the tip of his cock to John’s entrance and licked at the bloody spot on his shoulder.

“Oy. that’s not just two fingers worth, mate!”

Jason chuckled and reached his left hand around to press gently over John’s neck. “Shhh. You’ve been so good. And look at him. Isn’t he beautiful?”

John looked down at Dick and swallowed a dry lump in his throat. The young man was the picture of Adonis himself, splayed out for John’s benefit. “He’s just not fair,” John breathed.

“Listen, John. I’m going to wreck you.”

John closed his eyes, unable to help the way that his cock reacted to Jason’s promise. “Jay-Jay…”

“Shhh. I’m going to wreck you. Which means you should wreck him.” Jason pressed just a little against John, threatening to fill him up. “He needs this just like you do. It’s okay.”

John whimpered softly as Jason’s hands caressed his hips and moved around to grab his cock. He helped him to position at Dick’s opening, making sure they lined up nicely. “Breathe for me,” Jason whispered.

John inhaled slowly, then Jason thrust into him, punching the air from his lungs and pushing him forward into Dick as well. Dick scraped his nails against the stone and pressed his knees to John’s sides, holding him deep in place. Jason kissed at one of the bite marks on John but didn’t sink his teeth in this time.

Jason slowly began to move, setting the pace. John moaned, losing his mind as he was fucked from one end and fucking into another. Jason ran his hands over John’s pelvis, pressing into sensitive muscles so that he was holding John closer, pressing in deeper. Dick whined, grinding his hips on John, trying to get some friction.

“Harder,” Dick demanded, reaching out towards the boys. “Harder!”

John yelped as Jason’s thrusts became more violent. His inner thighs slapped against John’s ass, the sweat between them punctuating the motion with an embarrassing clap. John kept one hand to Dick’s abdomen and one in Jason’s hair and he was fucked into Dick’s willing body.

Jason had created a machine of pleasure, and as long as he was still running, John and Dick were to remain his willing victims. Jason chased his orgasm, feeling a little more himself with every thrust.

John came first, overstimulated and desperate for release. Dick’s eyes rolled up into his head and he moaned as John finished deep inside of him, painting his inner walls with his seed. Jason continued to push John through his orgasm, seeking his own and trying to let his boyfriend finish as well.

Dick came next, spurting onto his and John's stomachs with a shout. The sight was enough to push Jason over, but he chose to pull out and finish on the stone floor.

John collapsed next to Dick, panting from the workout he’d just gotten. Dick smiled and nuzzled up against his exposed chest. “That was fun,” Dick assured him. “Was it good for you?”

John scoffed and waved towards his castaway trench coat. Jay-Jay, if you would…right pocket.”

Jason retrieved the coat and fished through the pockets until he found a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. “Ah.” He handed John one and waited for him to press it to his lips before lighting the end for him. John took a deep drag and held it in for a while before letting the spindling strands of smoke climb up to the area where he’d first intruded upon the scene. “This was NOT how I saw my evenin’ goin’.” Jason settled onto his back at John’s other side, sandwiching him between himself and Dick.

“If it helps, I’m not thinking about drinking you or Dick dry anymore.”

John scoffed and held his cigarette over for Jason to take. “That’s good. Treatment’s working then.”

Jason took a drag then laughed. “Yeah. That’s some treatment, doc.”

John took his cigarette back and let his head loll so that he was looking at Jason. “So, throw me a bone, lad. You boys know the League. You’re in—” John gave Jason a once over with a soft whistle “—fantastic shape. Why don’t I know you?”

Dick pressed to John’s back and whispered, “How well do you know Batman?”

“Well enough to know he’s got a small harem worth of Robins and…Fuckin’ hell.” John cast the cigarette aside and tapped a finger to Jason’s sternum. “You’re Robin? Er. Night-Bird?”

Dick whined. “He’s um…he’s actually the second Robin…I’m Nightwing.”

John smirked. “You don’t understand. I know the Robins. I met the Robins. I consulted with Batman a time or two back in the day. There was Dickie-boy, the lad who thought he’d go off and wear a high collar and tassels to show his independence; and then there was Jason, the little shit who slashed Chas’ tires ‘cuz he talked shit about the Bat’s methods.”

Jason’s grin deepened. “How IS Chas these days?”

John couldn’t hide his astonishment. “Well…I mean he hates my guts, but that’s pretty standard. Bloody hell, you’re tellin’ me I…I…I was just…”

Dick nibbled at John’s earlobe before whispering, “You were just robbin’ the cradle.”

GAG REEL!

-In which John was just a little too late-

Dick’s mouth fell agape as the elder vampire sank his teeth into his neck. His pupils were blown as they fell on Jason as well, unseeing as more pleasure was forced upon him. He was lightheaded. Tired. Hot. No…cold?

The elder vampire pulled away from his neck and whispered, “Girls, it’s time. Bring your new brother to me.”

The women unlocked the cuffs keeping Jason bound and, in the blink of an eye, Jason snapped each of their necks.

“No! My darlings!”

Jason used his newfound inhuman strength to punch his clawed hand right through the elder vampire’s chest. He watched with ice cold fascination as the old man shlucked off of his arm.

Just then, the magical barrier keeping them enclosed and separate from the world shattered and a man in a long tan trench coat fell onto the scene.

“Bloody fuckin’ hell, didn’t think that’d work!” A blond man in a tan trench coat looked over at Jason in shock. “Oh, shit.” He fumbled around, looking for something in his pocket, but Jason was on him too quickly, teeth sunk deep into his jugular. The guy didn’t stand a chance. Within moments he’d drank the intruder dry and dropped his lifeless corpse, not a foot away from Dick.

“Jay…Oh god, Jay…”

Jason licked a spot of blood off of his lip and smiled hungrily. “It’s okay, Dick. I feel good.” He stretched, clicking his joints at every spot that they could before looking his boyfriend over with his glowing red eyes. “I can make you feel even better.”

-In which Jason drank a little too much of John-

John finished the runes and cracked his neck. “Alright then. Drink up beas—”

Jason was on him in the blink of an eye, holding him intimately and forcing his head to crane back, exposing his neck.

“Whoa whoa! Look, I’ve altered my juices so that you’ll be sucking in a lil’ sumn sumn what’ll undo the transformation, but let’s not forget I’m still human, mate. Do me a favor and show a lil’ restrai—yiii!”

Jason sank his teeth into John, drinking him almost recklessly.

John’s arms fell limply at his sides as Jason continued to drink him in. He stopped abruptly and licked at the bloody wound and nuzzled against his neck. “Mm sorry.”

But John didn’t respond.

“Hey…Hellooo?”

***

“I just wanted to have a nice quiet vacation.”

“I’m sorry.”

“This place has a famous bookshop. I just wanted to come out here, look for some rare books, and have a nice, romantic night with you.”

“I’m sorry…But we DID get rid of the vampires.”

Jason looked at Dick with enough blind rage to make him consider hitting the nurse call button just in case a murder was about to happen.

“WE did NOTHING! WE got felt up by some freaky fetish monsters before Union Jack over here jumped in and QUITE LITERALLY stuck his neck out for me!” Jason motioned towards their present company on the next bed over. Dick was done with his blood transfusion, but they were still filling the other guy. “Next time there’s some freaky mystery at our vacation destination, I swear, I will kill you before you say ‘nunjas.’”

-In which the question of clothes comes up-

John waited what he felt was an appropriate amount of time before tapping both boys. “Alright, mates. Nice as the nesting has been, there were other things I had planned for my trip. There’s this famous bookshop out here. Been told there’s a few tomes I should look into.”

Jason sat up. “You mind if we butt in? That’s actually why I came out here. I mean, not magic tomes, but I like rare books.”

“Rare books and rare birds, apparently. I wouldn’t be opposed to a little more honeymoon time with you two,” John noted.

Dick chuckled and sat up. He was still a little dazed but recovered enough to stand on his own. The first thing he did was pick up John’s tie and throw it at him. John chuckled as Jason picked it up and secured it around the older man’s neck. “Mmm. I think we could use the extra company. But it’ll be much nicer to go for round two where there’s a bed. You might be the old man, but I think I threw out my back.”

“Jaaaay?”

Jason got to his feet. “What’s up?”

“Weird question, but were you conscious when they took our clothes?”

Jason’s eyes widened. “Uhh. What?”

“I mean, I’ve got my boxers still but…”

Jason nodded. “Right. Right. Perfect. Romantic vacation and I’m going to be streaking through the night to get back to our hostel…”

“You could wear my jacket,” John offered.

Jason jumped at the offer, but upon trying to put it on it became apparent quite quickly that they had two very different body types. “Not that I don’t appreciate it, but I can’t even put my arms down, let alone close the front of this thing.”

John and Dick looked Jason over.

“I mean…there’s option B,” Dick noted.

“Why do I get the feeling I’m not gonna like ‘option B’?”

*****

Jason flopped down on the king size bed at their hostel room laughing. John’s tan slacks were unbuttoned and unzipped, held on his hips by a leather belt that was barely big enough to fully wrap around his waist. The white dress shirt hung open on his chest, both sleeves ripped off so that his arms could poke through.

Dick was still blushing as he rushed to his suitcase to find a pair of pants to put on over his boxers. “I think the woman at the front is still in shock,” he muttered.

“What do you think shocked her most? The playgirl model running around in his skivvies, the beefcake what looks like he belongs on a nickel romance novel, or the British git what looks like he’s gonna flash someone?” John asked, still tugging at his trench coat, wishing that it was just a tiny bit longer.

Jason chuckled to himself. “I think you guys look great. You can borrow our clothes ‘til we get you a new shirt. Thanks for protecting my dignity.”

John shut the door and scoffed. “I bloody well hope you don’t plan to put me in clothes so soon. I’m starting to think I might have some kinky fantasies in mind that include playgirl models and romance novels.”


End file.
